Why PM Modi Deserves A Nobel Prize In Entire Cloudology
Science is his passion, and his advice to the IAF was based on a lot of hard work and research which he does during his 21 waking hours every day.
Ladies and gentlemen, it is my “I told you so” moment. The talent of our honourable Prime Minister, which the world has discovered only now, was discerned by me two years ago when I had strongly recommended that he is worthy of being awarded Nobel prize in all spheres.
That the Nobel committee has not so far reacted to the recommendations is condemnable, especially given the revelations made by the PM only a couple of days ago about his contribution in the field of Physics. The discovery of the characteristic of clouds to prevent radars from functioning should put the doubts of sceptics to rest about the genuineness of the Degree in “Entire Political Science” obtained by him. They should invest their time in better pursuits.
His advice to the Air Force authorities to go ahead with the Balakot strikes in spite of clouds was a masterstroke, which the genius physicist of his calibre can only know. Science is his passion, and the advice was based on a lot of hard work and research which he does during the 21 waking hours leaving the more mundane tasks of managing the economy and law and order to lesser mortals. In fact, the three hours that he sleeps are also dedicated to the application of various aspects of physics for modernising our great nation and more particularly enhancing the capabilities of our armed forces. He dreams and breathes science.
The revenge for the Pulwama terror attack could materialise only because of the time invested by him in researching the nature and behavioural pattern of the clouds. It is only the insistence of journalists interviewing him that he admitted his personal contribution to the success of Balakot strikes. His modesty prevented him from revealing his other significant contribution to the operation. Well-informed sources, on oath of secrecy, have revealed that he was in constant touch with the pilots throughout the operation. When one of the pilots reported that clouds were moving far too slowly, he directed them in no uncertain terms that the advantage of cloud cover must not be lost come what may. To overcome the problem, he guided the pilots to adopt a unique technique and encircle the clouds along their circumference to match their speed.
Sources reveal that he gained such insight into the cloud behaviour not only as a result of painstaking research but also through the analysis of some other historical facts. Firstly, because of his in-depth knowledge of the scriptures, he was aware that the “Uran Khatolas” used during Mahabharat and Ramayana period were the modern day “Rafale jets” made exactly to Indian specifications. It is this ancient experience of making Rafales that compelled him to go in for the offset clause for making parts of the aircraft in India.
Secondly, he has carefully analysed the reasons for bankruptcy of a major airline of India. His analysis revealed that its aircrafts were flying without taking into account the cloud cover and pattern. Resultantly, the radar communication was adversely affected, leading to flight delays and high fuel consumption. Thus the airlines had incurred huge losses. The success of the Balakot airstrikes and Prime Minister’s insistence has spurred the other loss-making premier airline of India, and they have started avoiding Pakistani clouds which are particularly problematic. The ban imposed by Pakistan on use of its airspace by Indian aircrafts, has thus proved to be a boon.
The Prime Minister has always been a person with a scientific temper. He is to be credited for rediscovering and highlighting the role of science in ancient India. It is he who has brought out the fact that India was a pioneer of plastic surgery — Lord Ganesha being the first person to have gone through the process. He also is to be credited for highlighting the fact that stem cell technology was put to use for the first time to bring “Kauravas” into this world.
But for the constant pestering by journalists and their propensity to ask tough questions, his modesty would never have allowed this fact to come to light that he is the first user of “email” in the world. The high handedness of some western scientists has denied India the credit for this historic breakthrough in communication technology rendered possible by our Prime Minister.
Sources tell me that he plans to set up a full-fledged research centre for the study of cloud patterns and related issues by the name “International Institute of Cloudology”. He will devote his entire time and resources to this institute after he demits office some fifty years hence.
Meanwhile, I have reliably learnt that he has found political applications for “Cloudology”. His political alliance with Badals of Punjab is a result of this only because it helps him avoid radars.
Sanjiv Krishan Sood is a Retired Additional Director General of Border Security Force. Having put in over 38 years of meritorious service he has served along all the borders of our country with Pakistan and Bangladesh including eight years on LC, and in the sensitive Samba Sector of J&K. A security analyst, his interests include Border Management, issues of topical interest, the role of security forces in Security Matrix of India, politics and humour. He tweets at @sood_2